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NAME: Thomas Cruise Mapother IV
AUDIT DATE: December 12, 2001
AGE: 39
OCCUPATION : Movie Star/Producer
EXPERIENCE : 24 movies since 1981
I'm supposed to be smack in the creamy centre of Tom Cruise's target demographic. I was almost twelve when Top Gun came out, and god knows all my friends had serious crushes on him then. By the time I was a senior in high school, he was showing off his brainy idealism in A Few Good Men. I had just finished university and was soon to marry when he taught us all how to love in Jerry Maguire. And I was just starting to get the two-year itch (well, not really) when he took on the subject of marital infidelity in Eyes Wide Shut. By all rights, Tom Cruise probably should really boil my potatoes, but he doesn't, and he never has.
Despite my misgivings about him, Tom Cruise is undeniably the biggest, most famous movie star in the world. Sure, Harrison Ford's movies have made more money than Tom Cruise's have, but Ford has been in the business fifteen years longer and has churned out almost three times as many movies. Tom Hanks has more Oscars, but since Hanks wasn't saddled with model-perfect, hunky features, it's been easier for him to play the showy elder-statesman roles Oscar loves so well. When it comes to sheer, unadulterated star power, Tom Cruise has got more than any other actor his age. He's a supernova. His fame is so unfathomably unshakeable, in fact, that it's scarcely possible for anyone not to have an opinion on him. He's like the President of the United States of Fame.
And, frankly, looking over his CV, it's easy to see why. Sure, there are the high-profile flops (Legend, Far and Away), and some of his early work hasn't aged well (your Risky Business, your Losin' It), and his streak of Young [Blank] Who Ignores His Crusty Mentor And Plays By His Own Rules roles probably should have ended before Days of Thunder, and he occasionally veers into mawkishness that would make Robin Williams roll his eyes (Rain Man). Even so, he has been fairly choosy in his roles -- if you had to guess, would you have thought he'd only starred in twenty-four films since 1981? When Cameron Diaz has starred in twenty-six since 1994? -- and his choosiness has yielded a succession of certified box-office hits and three Oscar nominations.
So we may agree that Cruise's professional standing accounts for some measure of his fame -- the fact that when he goes on Oprah or Rosie, he gets the full hour, and the appearance is hyped for several weeks before the event, or the understanding that he will appear on the cover of Vanity Fair at least once every two years. But as we all know, there is a component of Cruise's fame that has nothing to do with his track record as an actor. There is a reason that the details of his recent divorce from Nicole Kidman was fodder not just for the tabloids but for People and Entertainment Weekly, and that the question of who was to blame was a topic of speculation far longer than when, say, Bruce Willis and Demi Moore split up a few years ago.
By the way, you can learn more about celebrity hookups, breakups, and all the juicy hollywood gossip at Hollywood Insider.
Despite all the Oscar nominations and $25 million paydays and such, Tom Cruise is as famous as he is in large part because he is widely believed to be a weirdo. Because we at Fametracker don't know Mr. Cruise personally, and because we don't want to get sued, we aren't saying that Cruise is a weirdo on the scale of, say, a Michael Jackson. We certainly can't comment on the veracity of any of the stories that, despite Cruise's best efforts (and those of his publicist, the legendary Pat Kingsley) to project an image of himself as the ultimate all-American boy next door, hang around him like a bad smell -- and when the news broke about his impending divorce from Kidman, those stories became part of the speculation surrounding the reasons for the separation as if they were facts in the public record. (Again, of the following scenarios, we are not saying any are true -- just that commentators and observers may have given voice to them in public. We were not among said commentators and observers, and we're still not now. As far as we know, none of the following statements is in any way true, just so we're clear, Tom Cruise's lawyers.) Was Tom ditching Nicole because he was getting set to trade her in for a new beard -- since we all know Tom is a closeted homosexual? Did it have anything to do with those sex therapists who had to be hired to work on the set of Eyes Wide Shut and teach Cruise and his wife how to relate to each other sexually, since they were apparently not accustomed to doing so? What about the baby Kidman miscarried? Since Cruise clearly couldn't be the father, who was? Had Kidman decided to leave Cruise because she was no longer willing to pretend to believe in the tenets of Cruise's faith, Scientology?
In the middle of all the bad press -- since People and InStyle quickly sided with Kidman -- Cruise decided to bring even more public humiliation upon himself by declaring war on some poor (male) porn star who'd told some tabloid that he'd had sex with Cruise, and suing him for the completely ludicrous sum of $100 million. Because, as we all know, the best way to defuse rumours that you're gay is to get hysterically angry in front of, literally, the entire world. I mean, $100 million? We surely don't have to spell out how that looks to us, because it probably looks much the same to you. (And also, we don't want to get sued.)
The strange thing, then, is the way in which Tom Cruise plays off the two sides of his fame against each other. Half the people who know of him (and, okay, given that he's probably among the top ten most famous people in the world, that's...half the world) thinks of him as a crookedly grinning, artfully tousled, squeaky-clean, mom-loving superstar. The other half think of him as an L. Ron Hubbard-brainwashed, sham-marrying, closeted homosexual who's only taken up with Penélope Cruz because she's so eager to crawl the fame ladder that she doesn't mind pretending to be in love with a gay man. (Which is certainly not to say that L. Ron Hubbard or any of this followers is actually in the habit of brainwashing anyone.) There isn't anything he can do to win over those who regard him as a phony or a weirdo -- or, rather, he seems to go out of his way, as with the $100 million lawsuit, to convince those who think he's hiding something that their impression is correct. And on the other side, those who've fallen in love with the public image he and Pat Kingsley have constructed will only get more and more convinced, with each successive white-bread movie role, that their impression is correct. Both sides are so deeply entrenched that there's no way for them to meet in the middle.
Given this détente, there's no reason to believe Cruise's fame will ebb any time soon. And it's not as though he could be any more famous than he is now, given that he's already Tom Cruise. Hugely famous though he is, we must grudgingly concede that he is exactly as famous as he should be.
Current approximate level of fame: Tom Cruise
Deserved approximate level of fame: Tom Cruise
It’s tough to follow up what filmmaker John Singleton has accomplished since his impressive imprint as the youngest director (age 24) ever to be nominated for an Academy Award for his gritty 1991 streetwise saga Boyz N the Hood. Since that audacious beginning, Singleton has been rather uneven in settling for arbitrary urban thrillers that possessed pockets of flashiness but lacked the true vision of tension-filled angst (2000’s stylish remake of Shaft and 2003’s roguish racing flick 2 Fast 2 Furious comes immediately to mind). In Singleton’s latest urban revenge thriller Four Brothers, his sassy narrative plays like a disjointed 70’s moody vehicle where displaying toughness on the mean streets is rooted in its usual cliched and conventional mode.
Four Brothers is intentionally modeled after John “The Duke” Wayne’s 1965 western fraternal fable The Sons of Katie Elder. Singleton’s frenetic exposition tells the tale about adoptive brothers (two sets of white and black siblings) who return home to bury their beloved “stand-in” mother—the patient and loving woman responsible for raising them when they were considered societal throwaway casualties. Unfortunately, 62-year old Evelyn Mercer (Fionnula Flanagan) was killed in what appeared to be a random liquor store robbery that was completely botched. However, further reviewing of this deadly incident clearly indicates that Evelyn may have been purposely executed as opposed to innocently being in the wrong place at the wrong time.
Naturally, the Mercer brothers come back to the old decrepit Detroit neighborhood with their own brand of grieving process in tow. In an effort to find out the dire circumstances behind their adoptive mother’s demise, the fearless foursome arrive on the scene with the sordid mentality to spill some gallons of blood on their terms in order to get to the bottom of this personal tragedy. Leading the charge of the returning sibs is hot-tempered Bobby (Mark Wahlberg). Smooth ladies’ man and ex-soldier Angel (Tyrese Gibson) joins in on the twisted fun. Respectable family man and savvy business guru Jeremiah (Andre “3000” Benjamin from the musical act Outkast) gets involved as well. Also, the youthful and tattooed rock star wannabe Jack (Garrett Hedlund) follows in the footsteps of his avenging brothers. Together, the Mercer boys are out to collect the scumbags that ended the meaningful life of their cherished inspirational guide.
As the Mercers look for the undesirables that murdered Evelyn, their childhood friend Lt. Green (Hustle & Flow Terrence Howard) warns them that it is the duty of the police department to launch an investigation and that their vigilante methods aren’t going to help matters. Partnered with the sensible black Green is white Detective Fowler (Josh Charles), a shady character in his own right. Feeling an understandable sense of frustration and loss, the Mercers realize that the police force has no control over the seedy streets. Plus, they don’t share the vested interest in cracking some serious skulls in the name of the dearly departed and sainted Evelyn Mercer.
While rampaging through the cold-hearted alleyways, the Mercers are forced to keep a close eye on resident crazed and colorful gangster kingpin Victor Sweet (Chiwetel Ejiofor from Pretty Little Things). As if dealing with the eccentric Sweet and corruptive cop Fowler wasn’t enough of a distraction for the boys, their personal lives add to the animated mix. Angel is emotionally wrapped up with his boisterous on-again, off-again loony-minded Latina girlfriend Sofi (Sofia Vergara) who brings instant dissention to the brothers’ looming agenda. Camille (Taraji P. Henson) is Jeremiah’s concerned wife who doesn’t want her focused husband to become too wayward and abandon his moral principles to appease the recklessness of his brothers’ influence.
Four Brothers was probably meant to be an action-oriented piece that embraced the concept of redemption as its soulful core. Singleton knows how to accentuate the flourishes of an actioner and relies on the stand-by premise of outrageous shootouts and exaggerated car chases in an awkward effort to capture the essence of his fiery flick. However, the movie maker fails to let the film resonate with genuine emotional depth pertaining to the sketchy characterizations. While it’s admirable for Singleton to paint his portrait in black-and-white overtones thus showing the good and evil that each side maintains, the interracial aspect feels conveniently gimmicky and only clicks as a forced afterthought. Most of the so-called riveting chase scenes—both cars and on foot—are murky and indistinguishable and really is nothing distinctive that you haven’t seen countless times before.
Although the quartet of lead actors are charismatic and portray the conviction of brotherhood with a touch of flair and fury, the material is not flexible enough to convey the clumsy offering of sentimentality and sensationalistic violence to uplift this movie as an introspective crime-ridden caper. The supporting cast is curiously lost in the shuffle. Howard is given a thankless filler role as the Mercer brothers’ law enforcing conscience from the past. Ejiofor is overwrought as a cartoonish crime lord in his ruthlessness as Detroit’s top badass. Screenwriters David Elliot and Paul Lovett merely go with the flow and concoct a scattershot script that scrapes at the raw surface of racial/economic class alienation and allegiance.
Surprisingly, Singleton’s Four Brothers doesn’t have the cohesive rhythmic pulse and pizzazz that was abundantly demonstrated in his producing credits for Craig Brewer’s probing debut drama Hustle & Flow. Clearly, Singleton shows no original or resourceful brotherly love for helming a transparent revenge-seeking rouser with all the psychological complexity and bluntness of a rusty sledgehammer.
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Alone in the Dark (2005) Lions Gate Films
1 hr. 36 mins.
Starring: Christian Slater, Tara Reid, Stephen Dorff, William Sanderson, Robert C. Bruce
Directed by: Uwe Bol
Geez, the uneventful month of January hasn’t even concluded yet but that doesn’t stop certain uncaring movie studios from tossing remaining cheesy junk on the big screen in a futile effort to clear their cluttered shelves. Besides, some of these distributors should at least have some heart when considering that it’s way too early in the year for movie critics and film fans alike to start contemplating their top ten worst films for 2005. Well, at least director Uwe Bol’s excruciatingly tired and tepid action-oriented suspense piece Alone in the Dark is an automatic and dubious choice given that it will undoubtedly be included on various bad movie-oriented lists as the new movie season trudges onward.
Whenever a randy pseudo-flashy and flimsy fantasy is headed up by suspect third rate leads Christian Slater and curvaceous kook Tara Reid one must not claim ignorance when choosing to avoid the warning signs. Alone in the Dark—the film’s apt title—describes the empty feeling one will maintain when watching this sci-fi stinker in an unlit, dank movie theater. Woefully murky and meaningless from the introduction of the opening credits, Alone in the Dark is even too incompetent to be an intentional camp-ridden miscue. As a filmmaker, Bol (House of the Dead) insists on overseeing this comatose creature-feature farce that serves no purpose other than to remind science fiction buffs that they can be doing something better with their time—perhaps maybe drawing in their nostalgic Star Wars coloring books?
Based on the video game (hmmm…that should be yet another glaring signal to tip off folks who were erroneously expecting a halfway decent flick), Alone in the Dark is an example of putrid patchwork at its lamest. There’s nothing special here that would make an overstuffed carnivorous alien burp on cue. If your idea of adequate cinema consists of showcasing well-paid irritating C-list stars that can’t act then great…knock yourself out. Or if you cherish a relentlessly scatterbrained plot, bargain basement CGI special effects and a barrage of cliched-driven flourishes that are so pervasive in this overwrought genre then bingo—you struck an unlikely sense of misplaced glee with wanting to be in the Dark.
In usual distracting form, a smirking Slater plays a former off-the-cuff paranormal investigator named Edward Canby. When Canby stumbles across a desired gem that may be a revered link to the ancient rivalry involving the conflicting philosophies of good and evil, he must determine the value of such a rare artifact. Alertly, he consults his ex gal pal Aline (Tara Reid), an intelligent assistant curator/archeologist (please resist the temptation to chuckle) about the treasured trinket he’s found. Soon, Canby’s checkered past will play an important part in his upcoming misadventures with the teaming of radiant Aline and their mysterious prized possession.
In an extraordinary bid to preserve order in the world, Canby and Aline must confront the sinister forces that dare to disturb their current existence. To ensure that some of the thick-headed audience could grasp the simple-minded concepts involving mysterious civilizations, madcap researchers and a shady governmental outfit known as Bureau 713, we’re treated to a patronizing opening where a voiceover sets the stage for this otherwise flaccid fable. In other words, the filmmakers were obliged to service the condescending gesture of having a narrator read the scrolling text off the screen—courtesy for all of you illiterates out there who couldn’t decipher the Mickey Mouse-style layout of wording. Gee, how thoughtful, huh?
Methodically, Bol’s nonsensical narrative rambles on without giving any serious consideration to the scarce storyline or the sketchy character developments that are all but abandoned. The film’s inexplicable insistence on scattering bothersome beastly intruders as an entertaining obstacle for the protagonists to blast away at will seems so aimless and inconsequential. It’s as if Bol and his handlers were trying to ad lib their way to an excitable climax as the movie meanders in search of its spontaneous pithiness. Overall, Alone in the Dark can’t escape its choking muck as it fails on every level imaginable to view as a palatable cheeseball sci-fi actioner.
Sadly, Alone in the Dark makes other uninspiring video-games-into-movie projects such as the Resident Evil and Lara Croft Tomb Raider film series look like Citizen Kane in comparison. The hammy over-the-top antics of Slater as a wayward action figurehead certainly scream volumes of indigestion. And having perennial party gal Reid being passed off as a capable professional woman with advanced knowledge is like expecting amorous NBA players to endorse a program for planned parenthood. It’s just not believable. The only thing convincing about the transparent participants in this spoiled spectacle is the manner in which they will get the last laugh on the clueless crowd witnessing them in one of the worst boisterous blunders of the year.
The world’s most durable and heavy duty flashlight couldn’t bring an ounce of brightness to the underwhelming Alone in the Dark.
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Daniel Craig Stars in A Whole New Kind of Bond Movie
The controversial new Bond movie "Casino Royale" takes James Bond back to the beginning of his career as 007 - and back to gritty basics.
Casino Royale is far from being a run-of-the-mill Bond movie. In an attempt to revitalize an ailing franchise, James Bond has been given a makeover – fewer gadgets, more realistic violence, and a screenplay based on the first novel he ever appeared in. And, of course, a new actor: Daniel Craig has stepped in to replace Pierce Brosnan as the face of Bond in this new era.
Both the look and the feel of this new Bond are a break with the route the series had been taking. Instead of one shot and a clever quip, the first death in the movie is an unpleasantly protracted bare-knuckle fight in a bathroom. When Bond is captured, the villain eschews laser-beams and timed detonators in favour of tying him to a wooden chair and lashing his groin with a knotted rope as the hero bellows in pain. Gadgets won’t get Bond out of trouble in this movie, and we even see him making mistakes whilst tailing a suspect. Most heretically of all, James Bond has to come to terms with the idea that a woman may have betrayed him, but still loved him.
This makeover was, arguably, necessary to save the series. The last installment, Die Another Day, was absolutely woeful, featuring Pierce Brosnan’s increasing arsenal of leers, a giant space laser, and an invisible car. But however much Bond needs rejuvenating, Casino Royale will raise howls of protest from many long-time fans of the series. Complaints that “That’s not the Bond I know”, or simply “That’s not Bond” have been frequently heard outside cinemas, and accusations leveled that the producers are diluting the character, or selling out in an attempt to attract a larger female audience. This is, nonetheless, an excellent thriller, and at the risk of enraging traditionalists, this reviewer considers it to be much better than any previous Bond film. It has some exhilarating action sequences, including one best described as “post-colonial parkour chic”, and less of the tedious machismo which slows up previous films in the series. The fact that the violence seems more realistic paradoxically makes Casino Royale a more moral film in one sense: it does not attempt to gloss over the consequences of physical violence, even if it seems to glamorize them. Casino Royale risks falling between two stools, by being insufficiently “Bond” for Bond enthusiasts, and insufficiently subtle for those who want more than simple action in their films. In the end, it’s still a Bond film (whatever that means to its various audiences), but one which suggests that there may be a future for 007 in the 21st century.
Did you love this movie’s take on Bond or hate it? Check out more film reviews over at Hollywood Insider.
N
ot since the controversial early episodes of
Zoom has a childrens' television program generated as much
debate as Teletubbies, the British show featuring four
seemingly lovable little critters. Are they hallucinogenic? Is their
endless baby-talk stunting the vocal development of a generation's
worth of kids? Are they (gasp) gay?
Who cares? All this meaningless talk only serves to mask a much
more serious problem: the myriad of subliminal pro-communist messages
this so-called "educational show" uses to bombard our unsuspecting
children, the ones most susceptible to its siren call. Skeptical?
Read on, and judge for yourself.
INTRODUCTION
How can four pudgy muppets espouse the myriad values of a complex socioeconomic system like communism? Through the same simple imagery the show uses to reach small children -- colors and size, used to illustrate the dialectic nature of the evolution of communist thought and so-called "progress."
The Teletubby Dialectic, illustrating the evolution
of socialist thought.
Consider that the youngest Teletubby (we won't make light of this matter by using their so-called "names" -- actually pseudonyms intended to cast ridicule upon those who might question the show's ideology) is red -- an obvious allusion to Karl Marx, communism's spritual progentior and representative of its youngest, most embryonic form.
Next youngest is the yellow one -- can the allusion to Mao's role in the evolution of communist thought be any more clear? Then comes the green one, a clear reference to the Green Party members that cement the coalition governments common in today's Socialist Europe.
The oldest one is purple, a color often associated with the royalty's divine mandate -- or in this case, the ideal classless society in which we will all live once socialism runs its inevitable historical course. (Note the lack of imagery linking to the failed Soviet experiment in communism -- as so-called Social Progressives are often wont to do, the show's creators have deftly removed any reference to their ideology's all-too-frequent failures.)
Nu-Nu: Helpful caretaker or symbol of the welfare state? |
In a clear message that socialists' proponents believe government can better provide for people than they can themselves through the free market, a robotic caretaker also keeps the group home in order, sweeping up crumbs (and presumably also keeping tabs on any similarly messy thoughts the CommieTubbies might have). Messages of "sharing" and "playing together" thinly disguise the show's true message -- the redistribution of income and the creation of the ultimate classless society!
Why? Perhaps it's important to consider the fact that
the show's creators are from England, home of unflouridated water,
cradle-to-grave socialism and appallingly poor cuisine (perhaps
explaining the plastic-looking "Tubby Toast" on the show).
MEET YOUR OPPRESSORS
Still not convinced? Let's take a closer look at
each of these subversive characters, as impeached by their own words
(reprinted as found on the left-leaning pbs.org Web site; author's annotations
are bracketed and in the blazing white of Truth, or
at least the glowing off-white of Right-Thinking America). Po (Karl Marx): Po is the smallest Teletubby.
She often jumps up and down to express her feelings of joy,
enthusiasm, and surprise [symbolizing the
idealistic nature of early communist thought]. The natural
place for Po is to be on her scooter zipping around the hills [Marx traveled between England and Germany].
She makes the noise "quickly, quickly, quickly" ["Workers of the World Unite!"] or "slowly,
slowly, slowly" ["Communism is a gradual but
historical inevitability"] when riding her scooter. Po spends
a lot of time on her own. Next to riding her scooter, Po likes to
keep an eye on the panel switches and controls on the central column
inside the Teletubbies' house [Marx was
obsessed with the means of production]. Laa-Laa (Mao):
Laa-Laa is the second smallest Teletubby. She is the happiest
and most smiley of the Teletubbies [Mao was
often photographed with an inscrutable smile]. She too loves
to sing and dance [a tacit acknowledgement by
the show's authors that Mao's cultural revolution was a regrettable
mistake]. Her favorite word is "nice" [Mao was believed to refer to Richard Nixon using this
word] Laa-Laa loves the way her ball bounces and wobbles and
grows bigger [Mao consolidated power across a
huge land mass]. Laa-Laa always likes to know where all of the
Teletubbies are [Mao's secret police was nearly
as ruthless as Stalin's]. She has her own special
La-la-la-la-la song [Commonly known as "The
Internationale"]. Dipsy (Representing the Green-backed socialist coalition
governments of modern-day Europe): Dipsy is the second
biggest Teletubby [Europe's socialist economy
is second in size only to that of the U.S.]. He is known for
his distinctive steps and ways of saying "hello." [Coalition organizations must proceed with caution --
on tiptoes, as it were -- and employ diplomatic rhetoric or face
dissolution.] He loves his hat very much [a clear reference to the EU, "covering" Europe with a
common currency]. Dipsy sings a song with a reggae beat [reggae remains popular in England, which with its
long dole lines and endless strikes, remains perhaps the best example
of socialism by coalition] and when he is feeling "especially
cool" will go for a walk by himself, wearing his hat and singing the
song [Again, "The Internationale"]. Tinky Winky (Representing the dialectic inevitability of the
socialist ideal): Tinky Winky is the biggest Teletubby
[One day, international socialism will conquer
the world]. He is the gentlest of the Teletubbies [In its ideal form, socialism will lack the repressive
nature of earlier attempts]. His favorite thing is his bag
[representing the acquired wealth and material
nature of capitalism], which he likes to take out with him for
walks [and redistribute the wealth]. He
loves to dance and fall over on his back. Tinky Winky loves all of
the Teletubbies, and his best friend is Po, the smallest one [True socialism in its purest form will be very
similar to what Karl Marx envisioned]. EPISODE WATCH
Still unconvinced? Consider the following
all-too-clear plot elements of this supposedly "nonlinear" show: COMMIES IN THE NEWS
Fortunately, we aren't alone. Below are reports from
our glowing global network of spotters and other Right-Thinking
Americans (identities are, of course, kept anonymous to protect the
innocent from the Red Muppet Menace).
In many episodes of "Teletubbies", the Commietubbies dance around
on what looks like a nice spring day.
In reality, they are MARCHING IN A MAY DAY PARADE. May 1st (May
Day) is is a holiday in the Commie world to honor the "Workers"!
In the U.S. (and neighboring Canada too), Labor Day is in
September, NOT on Communism Day, May 1st.
In one episode, Po was going around with a flag which I think was
RED. Isn't a RED flag a symbol of "Communism/Workers/The People's
Republic"?
All I thought was that Tinky-Winky was probably gay, but after
visiting your website, they may pose an even bigger threat than
Barney The Dinosaur!!!
(By the way, when you wrote about "Teletubbies" being the "most
controver- sial PBS show since the early episodes of 'Zoom",", I
differ. I didn't think "Zoom" was all that controversial. But Barney
the Dinosaur is! He too is a threat to our youngsters!!!) TIME FOR
COMMIE BYE-BYE! TIME FOR COMMIE BYE-BYE! Editor's Note: Barney? A threat? In fact, he is a
paragon of capitalistic success, his "can-do" attitude and
frequent appearances at local children's toy stores that cheerfuly
take credit cards ranging from Visa to Diners Club a shining example
of how American ingenuity extends even into the world of oversized
muppets. Besides, Barney often exhorts his militia-like group of
children to sing "Yankee Doodle Dandy," and as we all know,
communists HATE that song. Enough said.
From a Right-Thinking
American@nf.sympatico.ca i too agree with your views on these virulent alien bastards.will
their evil never cease?the real question now is,how lomg before those
nasty chinese come up with their own vile version.oooooohhhhhh,the
unthinkable......imagine an army of unstoppable asian socialist kiddy
programs .THE HORROR...THE HORROR.!!!!!yours truly,a concened
earthling. Editor's Note: Wait just a
minute. Let's not mire this serious discussion of a ideological
threat to our nation's youth in childish racial sterotypes. Besides,
the Japanese have been making superior consumer electronics and anime
programs for decades now, instilling in our children a healthy desire
to acquire and accumulate. They have nothing but our
gratitide.
From a Right-Thinking
American@fujicolor.com I happened to see your article and I agree 100 % with your
analysis. Anything on PBS is irresponsible socialist drivel. Keep up
the good work!
Editor's Note: Even the John Tesh
concerts?
From a Right-Thinking
American@neocat.net I love the webpage!!! It's absolutely hilarious!!! Have you
seen this webpage yet?
http://www.geocities.com/CapitolHill/Lobby/1709/index.html
Editor's Note: We see no humor in our
work here. This is a thankless, depressing duty for a card-carrying
subscriber of the Bill of Rights (except for that Miranda crap). And
we see no threat in the Smurfs. Along with being passe, they are so
small that just one of our American-made Barneys could stomp an
entire horde of the invading Teutonic creatures.
From a Right-Thinking
American@earthlink.net I can't quite put my finger on it, but I find Elmo to be quite
suspicious. Could it be his bright RED fur? That incipient laugh that
seems to imply a certain knowledge that escapes the rest of us? No, it
must be that leadership quality and profound speaking voice that makes
our innocent, impressionable children listen in an almost hypnotic
state. I truly fear this red comrade. We should all beware.
Editor's Note: All too true. But his
goldfish is really cool!
From a Wrong-Thinking New Zealander @
xtra.co.nz I have never heard so much claptrap in all my life, just because u
americans screw anything good from another country especially from
europe;)
Teletubbies are for the kids and the kids in us, my children do
not c anything but 4 little characters that make them smile and laugh
at what they say and do.
In fact that has been more educational than barney ever will be
with his two faced rubbish, he spouts so much rubbish that people get
on that kids cannot adjust to life in the real world of bullying and
hate.
I'd rather see my children learn from 4 great characters than one
oversized, stuffed fleabag that has less sense than the tubbies put
together;)
TELETUBBIES RULE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Editor's Note: Screw anything good from
Europe? Now, where exactly did Marx come from? Peoria? And how about
that Engels chap? Last time I checked, he wasn't from Akron. And
where were right-thinking Americans Ronald Wilson Reagan, Oliver
North and Kenneth Starr born? That's right--AMERICA.
They say the price of freedom is eternal vigilance, you know.
From a Wrong-Thinking
American@tcs.tulane.edu Is this a joke? If so, please forgive me, but I'm not sure whether
to laugh or vomit at the article I just read. The truth is, anything
can be interpreted to have Communist undertones--or any other sort of
undertones. Do you remember a certain craze called Mc Carthyism? If
you don't want your children to be influenced by such programing, take
some responsibility and monitor what they watch. However, it is not
your place to monitor programming for the rest of the world. Its
called freedom of expression, and anything that limits it is blatant
censorship. How can we know what is good unless we can compare it to
what is evil?
Get a grip, and get a life.
Editor's Note: That does it, missy. You
just made the list!!
From a Right-Thinking
American@voicenet.com New findings! The 1999 Teletubbie calendar is full of subliminal
messages aimed at corrupting our fragile children. Two particular
pictures jump instantly to an intelligent person's attention: 1:
The Lion. Appearing in an episode, the Lion roars " I am the scary
lion with the big scary teeth, I'm scary on the top and I'm scary
underneath" Is this an obvious allusion to the British Empire or
what? I mean, good God! Furthermore, the lion is chasing a Bear, that
cleverly avoids and taunts the lion, while laughing Tubbies look on.
Bear! Of course we are referring to Russia, obviously with the firm
hope in a restoration of Communist authoritarianism. 2: The
december picture has all the Tubbies gazing upon a brightly decorated
Christmas tree. All those scum can say is "Pretty Tree". That is
blatant attack on sacred Western beliefs on the consumerism of
Christmas! They should say " God Bless everyone", or "Merry
Christmas, except to China", or something like that. "Pretty Tree",
what the hell is that?!?!?
Time for Tubby Bye-Bye, for REAL, -A concerned commie basher
Editor's Note: Finally someone gets it.
Thank you, Right-Thinking American, and may you stay ever-vigilant
against polyurethane threats to our Way of Life.
From a Right-Thinking
Nigerian@yahoo.com THIS LETTER I AM SURE IS COMING TO YOU AS A SUPRISE, SINCE WE
HAVE NOT HAD ANY COMMUNICATION BEFORE. MY NAME IS [ IDENTITY WITHELD]
, A STAFF OF FEDERAL MINISTRY OF FINANCE . FOLLOWING APPROVAL FOR
THE PAYMENT OF LOAN OWED TO CREDITORS OF FEDERAL REPUBLIC OF NIGERIA
IN THE BUDGET OF 1998. I HAVE THE MANDATE OF MY COLLEAGUES TO SOURCE
FOR A RELIABLE BUSINESS MAN WHO WILL ASSIST US TO CLAIM SOME OF THIS
APPROVED MONEY. OUT OF THE APPROVED $836 MILLION FOR LOAN REPAYMENT,
$233 MILLION IS NON EXISTING LOAN WHICH WE HAVE CAREFULLY INCLUDED
AND NOW NEED A POTENTIAL FOREIGN PARTNER AS IT IS FOREIGN LOAN, WHO
WILL ASSIST US TO RECEIVE IT AND INVEST IT ON OUR BEHALF.
FOR A START WE ARE READY TO APPLY FOR AN IMMEDIATE PAYMENT OF $33
MILLION USD ONLY. THE PROCESS OF TRANSFERING THIS MONEY IS KNOWN TO
US AND WE ARE READY TO SHARE IT ON THE RATIO OF 60% : 40% ONCE WE CAN
JOINTLY FINANCE THE TRANSFER OF THE FUNDS TO YOUR ACCOUNT OR ANY
COMPANY ACCOUNT NOMINATED BY YOU. IT WILL TAKE A MAXIMUM OF TWO FULL
WORKING WEEKS.
PLEASE FOR THE AVOIDANCE OF DOUBTS, I WILL SEND THE PUBLICATION
FOR YOUR PERUSAL. FEEL FREE TO VERIFY THE PUBLICATION BUT DO NOT
DISCLOSE OUR IDENTITY OR INTENTION TO ANY BODY PLEASE. ON YOUR REPLY
FURNISH ME WITH YOUR PRIVATE PHONE AND FAX LINES FOR EASY
COMMUNICATION. YOUR FULL BANKING DETAILS AND NAME / COMPANY NAME.
WITH THIS INFORMATION WE SHALL APPLY FOR THE PAYMENT IN YOUR NAME.
IF YOU FIND THIS DEAL INTERESTING AND WISH TO ASSIST US DO NOT
HESITATE TO EMAIL ME. MIND YOU WE HAVE STUDIED AND TAKEN CARE OF ALL
POSSIBLE TRACE TO ORIGIN OF LOAN AS SUCH NO RISK IS INVOLVED FOR YOUR
PARTICIPATION. IT IS ALSO TO BE TREATED WITH UTMOST SECRECY. NOTE IF
FOR ANY REASON YOU ARE NOT DISPOSED AT MOMENT TO UNDERTAKE THIS DEAL,
LET ME KNOW ON TIME AS TO MAKE ALTERNATIVE ARRANGEMENTS. Editor's Note: Regrettably, we are too busy with our
ongoing battle against Communism to assist with this attractive
financial transaction. However, we laud you for providing an
excellent example of the benefits of shaking off the shackles of
Communism and taking advantage of a fledgling market economy in the
hopes of someday obtaining a computer keyboard with a caps lock key.
You have our gratitude.
From a Wrong-Thinking
American@dvol.com If you don't think that a capitialist would slit your throat as
quick as a communist, then you're in for a big surprise. NATO is just
a conglomerate protecing the interests of international bankers,
intent on world domination. By the way don't worry about the
Teletubbies, Pikachu and the rest of the Pokemon are here to kick
their ass. Editor's Note: And what
exactly is wrong with the international-banking conglomerate?
Last time I checked, there's a brightly-lit, working ATM right down
the street from me, charging only a modest "transaction fee" that is,
in reality, a wholly justifiable return on capital. And every morning,
an alarm clock generously provided by the same international cartel
awakens me from slumber to another day of fighting Communism. So we
engage in protracted air wars from time to time. Seems worth it to
me! From a Right-Thinking
American@martinbischoff.com It all started with Walt Disney... who was a complete fascist and
an admirer of Hitler! Don't you see a certain inevitable conflict in
the Teletubbies' rejection of the Mickey Mouse paradigm? Through the
innocent eyes and minds of our Youth, the classic struggle between
Marxism and Fascism is being played out! And the parents know
nossink! Goofy was, of course, the archetypical sleeping American.
Editor's note: You're absolutely right --
it's like the Eastern Front all over again (except maybe for the cold
weather).
From a Right-Thinking
American@interl.net I am thankful that you warned me of such now-obvious Communist
references in the cute, cuddly Teletubbies. I now notice this
evidence of the Teletubbies Communism, every time I watch. For
example, in every single episode, an item which appears to be a
windmill with incredibly sharp blades, starts to spin and emit a
white dust. Then all four of the Teletubbies jump up from their Tubby
Custard, Tubby Toast, or whatever they may be doing in their precious
minutes of spare time, and say, "Uh-oh." After this, they waddle out
into the field underneath the windmill and are forced to repeat an
incredibly difficult task - projecting a motion picture from the
centers of their stomachs - by the windmill, which appears to be a
reference to a state of totalitarianism, as are the aforementioned
speaking tubes. Group baths are also used on the show, and when using
their own assigned "Tubby Sponges," the speaking tubes come up from
the ground and tell them, "Wash, wash, wash. Wash wash wash. Tubby
tubby tubby tubby, wash, wash, wash." I believe that the rabbits
are very significant indeed, representing the common folk getting the
short end of the stick. The Teletubbies are always taking advantage of
the rabbits, in ways subtle but very startling indeed when you bring
Communism into mind. Are we forced to sit back and view our
nation's children slowly becoming mesmerized at this Communist
activity? Are we producing a generation of Communist children,
dooming our entire nation?! This business must stop now.
Editor's note: Eureka! The rabbits! That
had never occurred to us, though now it makes perfect sense. Perhaps
we should consider their inclusion a knowing wink to Orwell's
Animal Farm, or perhaps Watership Down, or
maybe even the subversive onomatopoeiac classic Mr. Brown Can Moo.
Keep up the good work, and remain ever vigilant against allegorical
threats to Our Way of Life, particularly in these critical months
before George Bush's slow-witted but Right-Thinking heir assumes his
rightful position at our nation's helm.
From a Right-Thinking
American@aol.com dont bash falwell on his statement of the gayness of tinkymywinky.
the ultimate sceme of both commies & faries is to pursue the goal of
ramming bolshevek bull**it right up our asses.falwell just hasnt
expectorated his idea properly. bill clinton also promotes
faggot-commie philosophy when he used a ceegar to poke lewinsky
instead of his happy stick. this conspiracy reaches all levels of
americanlife. the cure is to kill a commie for mommy & make the game
commision to declare april to be open season on ass-rammer commie
destroyers of our kids minds.
Editor's note: Er.... yes... we
think.
From a Wrong-Thinking
American@saintmail.net I think that you are badly mistaken. Anyhow, I find that your
site is sickening. As a Socialist I see that you are against the
unifying of the world, destroying racism and prejudice, and that you
are against the people. I guess you won't mind when the government
takes the last of our rights.
Editor's note: All we're against is the
left-leaning teachings of a bunch of plasticized muppets, Mr.
Gueverra--or may I call you Chez?
PS. You just made the list.
From a Wrong-Thinking
American@nwlink.com I am uncertain whether or not this site is to be take seriously,
but if it is, I advise the researchers to try and clearly distinct
between socialism, communism, totalinarianism, and capitalism. Orwell
was a socialist, and his book 1984 refered to what he feared
*capitalism* would do to the world. He even stated his support for
democratic socialism in another one of his books. For the sake of
fair education, please be sure to check your definitions and
references before publishing what could be seen as information.
Regardless of my personal political standing, your site gives the
perception that the right is a bunch of loonys completely ignorant to
the politics of those they diagree with.
Editor's note: For the last time, we
have no interest in endorsing George W. Bush's campaign! As for "fair
education," our apologies -- we're products of the left-leaning public
schools. From a Wrong-Thinking
American@aol.com Your site is the biggest piece of crap on the internet I have seen
in quite a while. Your interpretation is just that, an interpretation
(and a fairly rediculous [sic] one, at that). Are parents communists
because thay tell their children what to do (as the speakers do,
since the teletubbies obviously don't have "parents")?
And as for one of your readers [sic] comments on the Christmas Tree
episode, "Pretty Tree" is a simple phrase and probably
something a two-year old would say when seeing one. Don't forget,
Teletubbies is for small children who are just learning to talk. The
language is on their level, as are the activities. The pinwheel is
there to signify a big change in the show. The shorts that the
teletubbies receive in their tummies are from small children for
small children. The Nu-Nu is like a parent for the teletubbies, since
parents are the ones who have to follow their small children around
and clean up their messes.
Screw your conspiracy theory. It sucks. Editors Note: No parents, indeed.
Youve stumbled upon the communist dream! As weve seen in
such right-thinking texts as 1984, Anthem and the subversive
Kurt Russell vehicle Soldier, all parents do is instill senses
of doubt in the ruling order and promote self-worth, religion or,
worse yet, a propensity to vote Democratic. Nu-Nu may be like a
parent to the Teletubbies, as you assert -- but only in the same way
the Gummint is like a parent to welfare recipients when it tells them
they cant use their food stamps to buy tobacco harvested by
hard-working, Right-Thinking Americans, or ammunition, as is their
Charleton Heston-given, Second Amendment right. It sucks? It
certainly does, Fidel, it certainly does.
From a Wrong-Thinking
American@aol.com I can't figure out if you're funny or if your [sic] just an idiot
that watches far too much television. If you don't like the show you
have a right to unplug the television and shove it in the closet. You
aren't forced to watch it, and if the "commies" want to
produce a television show to convey their ideal, so be it. It's
called freedom of speech buddy. Get over it and get a life.
Editors Note: Unplug the
television? And miss the latest episode of the pro-capitalistic,
Right-Thinking show, Who Wants to be
a Millionaire? Never!
You can have my TV when you pry it from
my cold dead fingers, pal.
From a Right-Thinking
American@shelby.k12.mi.us Our class is studying various philosophies and came across your
web page. In order to better evaluate its content, we would like some
information on the author.
1. What level of education does the author have? 2. Is the
author associated with any higher educational institution or
organized association?
3. Is this a serious attack or an extremely well written parody
(that's a genre we're exploring this semester)? 4. Who is your
intended audience?
Editors Note: At long last, our
left-leaning schools are actually teaching our youth something of
true value -- the value of eternal vigilance. Teachers and students,
you have our eternal gratitude.
Oh, and in the interest of full
disclosure, we aren't associated with any organized group. But we
were briefly members of the Columbia House Record Club in the
mid-1980s.
From a Right-Thinking American@wcoil.com
Found your site totally by chance, and I was amazed at the amount
of solid evidence you have. I was never a fan of Barney, however my
sister's three kids love it. They refuse to watch the commietubbies
though!!! Here are a couple thoughts of my own, however they may not
be as shockingly evident as yours.
I don't totally agree with Falwell stating that Twink is gay,
however his name sure indicates it. The traditional Communist, gay or
not, is not going to make his sexual orientation public knowledge.
Yes, the communists were known for a large gay population, but the
government would not approve of the widespread "gayness", like in
America today. While speaking to the wife of a business associate
the other day, she stated how her twin boys love the teletubbies. The
tone of voice and facial expressions she had while telling me this
demonstrated to me that she had been brain-washed by the show as
well. She thinks that since her kids are perfect angels while
watching she can do housework AHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! The commietubbies
are taking the place of the parent. Who needs parents when the
government is a better teacher?!?!?!?! My mother works at a
pre-school and she positively, absolutely hates the commietubbies. My
mother is 64 years old and well remembers the 50's and 60's communist
uprisings and propaganda. My father served in the US Army in '56 and
I have been brought up extremely Anti-Communist. Kudos, my friend!!
PS. The Battle is large, but your army is building! Editor's Note: While we do not approve of anything
that detracts from housework or other legitimate, right-thinking
activities (like gutting fish or voting Republican), we must resound
the warning bell our fellow comrade sounded above -- DO NOT LET YOUR
CHILDREN WATCH THIS SHOW UNATTENDED! The communists have long
advocated turning children against their parents. If you fail to heed
this warning, don't be surprised when there's a knock on the door. And
another knock. And another knock.
Why do you consider Zoom to be a controversial show? I watch the
show all the time and i do not find it in the least controversial.
Editor's Note: Not controversial? Don't
you remember the dubious experiments intended to turn young minds
away from the right-thinking Creationist teachings of the Kansas
Board of Education, the subverise left-leaning riddles (the ones
about peanuts were a clear allusion to Zoom political ubermensch
Jimmy Carter), and, worst of all, the hypnotic subliminal chant of
the mailing address that haunts us to this day? (Box 350, Boston,
Mass., 09124). They say the
price of freedom is eternal vigilance, you know.
I noticed that you didn't include the effects that the tubbies are
having on the teens of our nation. At many "raves" you can see a
drugged out teenager decked out in bright colors, toting a small
stufed depiction of one of the tubbies. This is an obvious sign that
the effects are infiltrating our system, forcing an otherwise normal
child to take dangerous drugs and carry around a symbol of their
instigator. Is it a coincidence that these raves first became popular
in Britain, where the tubbies first were shown? I think not.
Editor's Note: What's worse, none other
than the ostensibly "American" McDonalds was recently giving away
these small stuffed depictions of these loathesome Lenninites.
Imagine the irony -- ordering an All-American Meal (tm)(R)(sm) and
receiving one of these insidious toys as a "prize." (Capitalist Tenet
No. 1: Nothing Good is Free.) Worse yet, many of these McDonalds now
hide inside our greatest shrines to American ingenuity and know-how,
the friendly neighborhood Wal-Mart SuperCenter(tm)(R). Fellow
right-thinking Americans, we implore you to resist this Trojan Horse
wrapped inside an all-beef patty(tm).
THE POISONOUS EFFECTS OF THE COMMIEBITCHTUBBIES HAS INVADED MY
HOME. WITH THE HELP OF GOD-BLESSED AMERICANS LIKE JOHN WAYNE , ELVIS,
& GENERAL PATTON ; VICTORY OVER THESE INSIDIOUS PERVERTS HAS BEEN
ATTAINED. EVERY TIME MY THREE-YEAR-OLD TURNS ON THESE COMMIE
C**T-PUS-DRIPPINGS , I PULL OUT MY 12-GAUGE & BLOW AWAY THE T.V. . IT
WORKS EVERY TIME. WHEN I SEE TELECOMMIES AT THE MALL POISONING THE
MINDS OF AMERICA'S CRUMB-SNATCHERS , I JUST SIC MY DOBERMAN ON THEM &
KNEECAP THE FUZZY RUNNERS TO HELP MY DOG EAT THEM. GOD BLESS AMERICA
&KILL TELETUBBIES ON SIGHT. KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL
Editor's Note:
Dear Sirs, Editor's Note: Nice try, comrade. You can
have my bucket ladder dredger when you pry it from my cold, dead
fingers, Ivan.
From a Right-Thinking American@voicenet.com
It really scares me when people respond to a site and start
criticizing the webmaster. I can't believe anyone is so f******
stupid as to believe that this is serious. Are these the same people
that think that back in 1200 AD we in England pretended to ride
horses while banging coconuts together? I am both amused and
terrified by the utter ignorance of people, how the hell did you turn
your computer on without electrocuting yourselves?
Besides Po-La La- Dipsy-Tinky-Winky said fast enough and with a
little slur is actually Russian for Che Guevara and Fidel Castro are
absolutely peachy. Bet you idiots didn't even know Russians had a
term for peachy.... Editor's Note: We
believe the author of this letter is referencing the subversive
Monty Python and the Holy Grail
in an attempt at humor. BEWARE! This
so-called "comedy" is in fact a thinly disguised attack at the
concept of monarchy, from which we dervied our plutocracy, from which
we derive our rights as Right-Thinking Americans. They say the price of freedom is eternal vigilance,
you know.
From a Right-Thinking American@aol.com
what's the real story behind these characters..i know that ther
are some X-rated pictures of them doing weird things...it may be
called Baschinf or something like that..if you have any clue e-mail
me and let me know where this sight [sic] is.
Editor's Note: We have no time for such
frivolities as we continue our battle against all threats to our
great plutocracy. Nor are we enticed by such tugs at our baser
nature, surely a plot in and of itself to lure our younger, weaker
youth who are already under seige by such insidious influences as
postpubscent boy bands and the overly attractive anchors on the
Weather Channel. PS. What's
that URL... anyone? Anyone?
From a Right-Thinking American@aol.com
I have watched my granddaughter stand up and sit down on command
with these monsters in pablum coating! The damn commies didn't die
with the Soviet Union; we have the yellow hordes poised to strike at
any time! North Korea is a festering sore! Red Chine (yeah, Red) has
over three million people in uniform! When are we going to wake up!
Those in England who produce this trash should be arrested, and
brought to this country. We then arrest their American counterparts
who allow the show to be aired. They should then be executed (no
trial) in a hideously painful way, and the entire nation FORCED to
watch, NO CHOICE!! Oh, to hear their screams of agony!! Earl Pitts,
where are you when we need you. WAKE UP, UMERICA! Editor's Note: Another Uniter, Not a Divider. You
have our undying gratitude.
From a Right-Thinking American@hotmail.com
I knew those CommieTubbies were evil the first time I saw them.
Thank God for pages like these, had I not found it I might have gone
on thinking the CommieTubbies were just another kids show. Now I
realize the threat they present and I'm going to do something about.
I have also done a tremendous amount of research on the show ZOOM and
have found that they are trying to make a paramilitary strike against
our government. It's obvious that the multi-cultural kids represent
different fascist groups--Keiko-Mau Zedong; Pablo-Totalitarianism;
Alisa- Communism (she even admitted she was Russian on one show);
Zoe-Nazi Party; Lynese-Confederacy; Jared-Israeli; David- ?
I still have lots of reasearch to do but you can obviously tell
they are trying to form a resistance and overcome the good ol'
American government, but we are on to their little plan aren't we? We
need to stop them before it gets too serious. PBS is actually the
entire infrastructure that holds it all together. The so-called
pledge-drives really supply money for weapons and vehicles. They
really get their money from sweatshops in Africa and Asia. They take
advantage of the poor and stupid promising great things but giving
little in return. And the workers can't turn to anyone. We need to
stop the evil before it spreads any further.
Editor's Note: Absolutely. This sweeps
period, I'll be sending my pledge check to UPN, the makers of
the fine, Right-Thinking programming When Chefs Attack: America's
Dirtiest Kitchens Caught on Tape.
From a Right-Thinking American@hotmail.com
This is a very well thought out site I must say. Although you
missed one thing here. As a former student of communism, I learned
that one of the recruitment methods for KGB agents was promise of
'social and sexual' freedoms. Which brought in your gay and bi-sexual
members of 'oppressive' societies. Hence the whole tinky-winky
thing... Think about it people...
Editor's Note: Eurkea! It's all starting
to make sense. Someone give J. Edgar Hoover a call, and we'll have
this whole purse-wearing nonsense wrapped up by sundown.
From a Right-Thinking American@aol.com
Yesterday, I was smokin' crack (purchased from a very capitalistic
youth on a street corner) with Johnny Cash. We was just sittin'
around, thinkin' about goin' and gettin' some beer, when I mentioned
your website. He was interested, so I wheeled him over to the
computer, and punched ya'll up...Lemme just say he went plumb crazy
with rage..started droolin' and spittin'...and his eyes went all
wacky. Next thang I knew, he was on the phone to Merle, Willie, and
Waylon. They all came by the house with two fifths of Wild Turkey,
and we discussed the situation. After we had finished of the whiskey
(and Willie's pound bag), we decided action must be taken.
To make a long story shorter, we all bought us some
gasoline...went down to the Nashville PBS...and burned that fu*ker to
the ground. As we watched the flames eat away at the communist threat
in our neck of the woods, Merle remarked, "That's reel purty".
Just letting ya'll know us god-fearing country boys is [sic]
behind ya'll 100%. God Bless. ...
Editor's Note: That's the most beautiful
story we've heard since the tales of heroism of the Florida State
Troopers during the November elections. Frankly, however, the concept
of a PBS affiliate located in Right-Thinking, Gore-Rejecting Nashville
concerns us -- if true, it would be something akin to seeing a sex
shop in the Vatican -- or , worse yet, Branson, Missouri. Thank you
-- and thank you, too, for invoking the name of the great,
Right-Thinking Johnny CASH, who by very his very name could
NEVER be a communist.
From a Wrong-Thinking Chinese@all1source.com
With the current economy slowdown, each and every company are
trying all possible ways to keep their business competitive. Some of
the most effective and fastest solution to increase competitiveness
are thru out-sourcing and purchasing cost reduction. All1Source is
specially focused to offer professional sourcing and supply solution
for industrial and manufacturing industry with supply base spread
accross Asia major manufacturing hubs namely China, Taiwan ,
Singapore , Malaysia to name a few. Our Sourcing Specialist will
project manage right from identifying and developing right supplier
in meeting your requirements in cost, delivery, quality and
capability to first article qualification, preliminary production run
till mass production qualification. Our current sourcing strength is
much focused on the following areas 1. Complete Tooling Design and
Fabrication In most cases, we could help our
client to >>SAVE MORE THAN 50%<< of their original price thru our
strategic global sourcing network. We could extend our service and
help your company to save cost too if you make your first step ...
Editor's Note: Here's our "first step" --
a boot right into your godless, communist spine.
From a Wrong-Thinking American@aol.com
I hate teletubbies....... but because they are obnoxious and
annoying, but communist?
You guys are the f---ed uppiest idoits I have ever come across!
Get yourself a girlfriend, will ya!
Cut out this insane bulls--- before you hurt yourself........
Editor's Note: "Get" a
girlfriend? Perhaps in your ideal communist state, the government
will make your dreams come true and issue you one (much as in the
cautionary tales Anthem or Weird Science). As for the
rest of us, we'll continue to seek the comforts of the opposite sex
by hitting the modern-day meccas of Right-Thinking mingling -- the
friendly, clean and reasonably priced neighborhood Applebee's
(tm)(R).
From a Right-Thinking American@aol.com
pbs is free because it sucks
Editor's Note: Agreed, but there's one
hole in your otherwise flawless logic. Fox-TV, purveyor of the
jingoistic reality program Boot Camp, is also free -- yet at
no cost, the show still whips our nation's impressionable youth into
a bloodthirsty frenzy that will serve them well in the Second Gulf
War. As the ads for Mastercard, that pillar of our capitalistic
society, so wisely say, "There are some things money can't buy."
And for everything else, there's...um, Cinemax.
From a Right-Thinking American Youth @
aol.com I'm in 8th grade and although most of the kids in my school
despise the evil little bastards. I have found some nitwits obsessed
over them though and it makes me sick! The people who are obsessed
seem incredibly gay and happy all the time. It scares me to see them
so happy. Those little dumbass commies have even somehow gotten to
the teachers as well!!! Our educators are being brainwashed by
commies disguised in funky critter suits!!! I cant stand to watch as
the world succumbs to there idiotic baby talk babble that holds
messages of horror!!!! God save and Frith above help us!!! We must
KILL!! the Tubbies!!!!!KILL!! KILL!!! KILL!!!
Editor's Note: Once again, it seems our
so-called "public" schools are merely venues to push a certain agenda
-- the pro-leftist puppet agenda, to be specific. Fortunately, at
least some of our youth have been instilled with enough God-fearing
values (most likely through watching such high-quality, family-value
oriented childrens programming as Hammerman and
John Ritter is Clifford: The Big Red Dog (tm)(R)) to
see through the facade. Will no one act now, before another ribeye
steak-related heart attack pulls the hands of George Bush's
Right-Thinking But Dimwitted Son's Vice President from the reigns of
power?
From a Right-Thinking American@ aol.com
There needs to be an animated episode of Sheriff
Ricochet Rabbit and Deputy Dog blasting those little bolshevik
bastards with Colt 45s, dispatching them to them fires of Hell ! Editor's Note: All
too true. And let's do it now, before the Powers of Evil force the
exclusion of cartoon guns from our nation's great airwaves in much
the same way they flagrantly stripped the First Amendment rights of
our nation's God-fearing cartoon cigarette characters. We miss you,
Mr. Smokes-a-lot(tm)(R), we truly do.
From a Muddled-Thinking
American @aol.com
listen i swear i wont tell anyone if you just
tell me that all this is a joke. I mean cmon, you cant be
serious! can you?
Editors Note: And what
exactly is funny about a global communist conspiracy? Anyone? Anyone?
Thank you.
From a Right-Thinking American @aol.com
What about all the violence on TV. I mean
I dont know about the tubbies but what are the powergirls [sic]
who get punched in the face teaching our youth today? I only let my
child watch stuff like Veggie Tales and Christian cartoons. This is a
sick place when I let my child watch Toy Story only to learn that the
word idiot is used way to [sic] often in it. What is that teaching
our youth? That it is ok to call people names? I know that they will
someday face these things but why in the world do we want them to see
it on a Saturday morning cartoon? Editors Note: Like our great, Right-Thinking
leader, the Powerpuff Girls teach a valuable lesson: Youre
either With Us Or Against Us(tm). If anything, we should be beaming
episodes of the show into North Korea, to teach their
Teletubbie-loving Dear Leader a thing or two about
preemptive action. As for Toy Story, it, too, offers up an
all-too-often-ignored message for our capitalistic society: In the
absence of love and a two-parent family, buying vertiable pantaloons
of toys will keep the little rugrats happy and emotionally fulfilled.
And for that, they have our gratitude.
From a Wrong-Thinking American @ aol.com
Are you people for real! I dont know what you
have been smoking but you should cut down. Its starting to
stunt the growth of brain cells of what little you have. Teletubbies
is a great PBS program for any child and Barney! Editors Note: Cut down?
Nice try, Ivan. You can have my American-grown, American-processed
and American-marketed-to-minors-and-minorities cigarette when you pry
it from my cold dead hands.
From a Wrong-Thinking American @ cs.com
What is this junk I stumbled across when I was
researching bin Lauden. [sic] Dont you people have anything to
do? Editors Note: Now
more than ever, we need to come together as a country. Massive tax
cuts and protracted air wars against sandy countries arent
enough to hold a nation challenged together. We need ideologically
motivated muppets to whip up the
appropriate outrage to maintain solidarity through the 2004 elections
and the threats to democracy that they could pose.
From a Wrong-Thinking
Netherlander @ isd-holland.nl
U should seek psychiatric help. Editors Note: And
U, of all people, Karl, should know that the fathers of
modern psychotherapy Freud, Jung, Van Dike didnt
hail from Right-Thinking locales such as Craigsville, Va., or
Crawford, Texas. Nope those names all sound like theyre
straight from freedom-hating, Coalition of the Unwilling Europe.
Especially that last guy hes probably from your
vowel-happy, objectively pro-communist neck of the woods.
The price of freedom is
eternal vigilance, you know.
From a Right-Thinking American @ hotmail.com
I always knew there was something horribly wrong when
it came to the Telitubbies. For a time I just thought I was scared of
them for no reason, but now it is all to clear. My fear can now be
justified! They are not just scary looking creatures that cant
talk, act gay and watch TV from their friggin stomachs, they are
socialist pigheads trying to take over the world by brainwashing the
children. That right there is a socialist act. When a socialist
country would take over another country, they would start their work
at the schools, brainwashing the kids into thinking that socialism
was a good thing. They knew if they got the kids sucked in, socialism
would take over. WE NEED TO GET TELETUBBIES BANNED!!! AHHHHH! Editors Note: The schools?
The Teletubbies are far more insidious, attempting to inculcate in
our youth the benefits of socialism YEARS before they first go to
school. When will we stop allowing such brazen attempts at treachery
targeted at those nearly 17 years too young to purchase chewing
tobacco, vote Republican or join the NRA?
From a
Wrong-Thinking American @ hotmail.com
hahahahaha what the hells wrong with you? how
much free time do you have to have to analize the teletubbies,
its a mindless childrens show. they dance around and make
weird little noises, and on top of that the show was made in ENGLAND
they arent communist in England theyre a figure head
society. Its like saying sesame street is satanic because
theyve had rock stars appear on the show! Like or hate the
teletubbies I seriously doubt they promote communism, I think
youre just reading between the lines a bit TOO much and need to
stop watching childrens shows
Editors Note: Sesame
Street has had rock stars appear on the show? They just made the list.
From a
Wrong-Thinking American @ epix.net
Im a mother who was innocently looking for some
Teletubbies books when I came upon your website. At first I thought it
was a joke. Then I realized that some people have nothing better to do
with their time than to fabricate some ridiculous theory about a
childrens television show and create a website, pretending to
have substantial evidence backing it. Well, this reader didnt
buy it and Im sorry I even wasted my time reading it, although
I felt angered enough to let you sorry excuses know how much I think
youre in desperate need of psychiatric therapy and should spend
your time doing something valuable. I pray that you arent
parents, because you will raise your children to be as paranoid and
sceptical as you. My children love the teletubbies and it makes them
happy and, frankly, thats all that matters to me! Editors Note: Ideology
aside, were glad the show makes your children happy. You know,
I heard that Trotsky was happy in Mexico, too.
From a Wrong-Thinking Australian @
iprimus.com.au hmmm I think you have some problems that need
resolving! What is your problem with communism any way? It has some
great ideas and the only problem is that it has never really worked.
Also it can never exist. As long as Americanism exists. A great
example of this is Cuba. America refuses to trade with Cuba only
because it is a communist country! And things in Cuba are OK. If
America (globalisation my anus!) did trade with them maybe they would
have a chance to show the world that communism isnt that bad at all!
It failed in other countries only because of the dictators that took
over. If anyone has actually bothered to read anything about the
IDEAS of communism they would understand it is a lot better for the
general population. Did you know 80% of the worlds food goes to 20%
of its people. This is due to Capitalism - the rich get richer the
poor get poorer. And thats the way is goes. Personally America makes
me sick!
so much whooohaar about sep 11th, yet last year the
American government killed over 60,000 women and children through
food sanctions in Iraq. Also Americans funded Osama binladen - they
also funded Saddam, gee it seems whoever they fund terns out to be
evil..I wounder why that is!
Editors Note: Things in
Cuba are OK? Hmm, Fidel, methinks thou dost protest too much. If
things in Cuba are so great, why the not-so-hidden plea for free
trade with the US? Could it be that the so-called workers
paradise of Cuba, despite its admirable skills in the areas of
cigarmaking, DeSoto maintenance and fold-out sofas, lacks the
abundance of cheap consumer products imported from China that
youd find in the brightly-lit, frequently cleaned Wal-Mart in
even the most forsaken of American towns?
Good day, I found the information about your company
and your email address on the internet pages related to the wood
market (google,yahoo,emarketservices,globalwood etc.) As stated on
the the mentioned search engines your business activity is the wood
trading, At the present time i am looking for a buyer of the wood
production from Lithuanian mills to the European, UK, USA or Japan
markets (Russian and Lithuanian timber). The mills i represent, can
produce almost everything from pine,spruce, oak - either
fingerjointed or solid. Other wood species can also be provided upon
request (larch etc.) Please visit my web site to find out more about
seveal kinds of wood production i can supply.
Editors Note: Nice try,
Boris. You can have my American-made fingerjointed wood products when
you pry them from my cold, dead hands.
From a Wrong-Thinking American @ aol.com
Yes, I have a finding : you guys are crack-Os!
Idiots! Right-wing-damn-republican-aholes! If your dumbass
[self] thinks the tubbies are bad, then so is the rest of the
world for criticizing Bushs march to war. I know you have free
speech to present this absolute bullst as factual information
and not as the fascist propaganda it is, but you really should
include a disclaimer. (i.e. : Disclaimer : Nothing on this
website is in any way to be construed as un-baised, factual
information, because its really just bullst.) As I am a Marxist
. (if youre to damn stupid
to know what that is, its like industrial communism), your sick
perversion of a harmless childrens show disgusts me. You should
also note the difference between Communism, Marxism, Leninism,
Marxism-Leninism, and Socialism. You claim different tubbies
are Socialist and Communist and Marxist. [As a Marxist] I have no
desire to work with the Communists. Why would different
economic-theorists work together?
Your fascist ass [-hole self] needs to get one of
each of the following : a life, a brain,
And
perhaps youd like to start thinking for yourselves to
instead of letting Limbaugh do your thinking for you.
Editors Note: Now wait
just a minute, Karl. You mean there are people out there who actually
opposed the Great Liberation of Iraq(tm)(R)? Really, Che, talk about
propaganda
.
PS. You just made the new,
more Patriot-y, list.
We can't do it alone! We need vigilant
spotters to report other examples of un-American activities on
Teletubbies. Report
your findings here. And do it now, before we see a hammer
and sickle flying over the Capitol Building! Copyright 1999-2003, a right-thinking American.
All rights reserved.
VIGILANT SPOTTERS
Eh-oh, indeed.
We have considerable interested in cooperation and mutual beneficial
business with Your company. "PROFFY" STAFF OFFICE working in many
fields of business. One of them is employment of Ukrainian
specialists in foreign companies. We can select and offer our
specialists for the following branches:
MARINE & FISHIERY for fishing ships: captains, deck officers,
trawlmasters, fishmasters, engineers, electricians, radio
officers-radio navigators (especially for purse seiners), processing
engineers, fitters of fishmeal and fishoil, oilers, welders. for
cruise/passengers ships: captains, deck officers, engineers,
mechanics, electricians, radio officers, seamen, chefs and galley
staff, waiters, stewards, cleaners, plumbers, fitters, welders,
nurses, etc. for technical fleet for work at tugs, bucket ladder
dredgers, section dredgers, etc.
SHIPBUILDING & SHIPREPAIRING
pipe-fitters, sand blusters, spray painters, electricians, electronic
technicians, compressormen, warehourse workers, riggers, sheetmetal
workers, shipfitter, tool repairmen, welders, welding engineers,
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2. Tooling spares and insert mass machining
3.
Carbide , ceramic and diamond tools and punches
4. Manufacturing
of precision metal stamping components
5. Manufacturing of
precision machining components
Nice try, Mao,
but our precision metal stamping components will continue to be
American made, as God intended them to be.
From a Wrong-Thinking Lithuanian @ hotmail.com